Sometimes Sri Gurudeva, in personal dealings, may give different instructions to different disciples according to their adhikar, but never in opposition to sastra or the chosen path.

Sometimes, due to weakness, the sadhaka is not able to follow all the instructions of Sri Gurudeva to the point.

It is the nature of the conditioned mind to give up, feel helpless or even start to doubt Sri Gurudeva.

When we are living in this world, working full time with a responsible job and even family, there are times when our practice seems to go down and we feel frustrated or without hope.

It happened to me after I did three years of very intense sadhana from 3 am to 6:45 am as a full-time school teacher and I was exhausted by doing this…2004 (diksha) to 2007.

I was feeling very frustrated and pretty on the down low.

But I found the courage to open my heart to my Gurudeva instead of burying my head in the sand.

So, I asked my Gurudeva to instruct this fallen jiva with the “minimum of instructions”…I wrote him a very personal letter.

He very mercifully replied by hand written letter and adjusted the mandatory sadhana to the level of my adhikara back then. He was very sorry for my situation but completely without judgement.

I could feel his loving care and empathy between his letters.

So, I started again with the minimum and increased it week by week, month by month.

This shows two things:

Sri Gurudeva is unlimitedly merciful and understanding.

It needs HONESTY and COURAGE for the disciple to open his heart.

Only then can Sri Gurudeva intervene and shower his mercy to us in full.

His mercy is always there, but our honesty and humility let it rain much more.

If we can´t bring ourselves to show our weakness to Sri Gurudeva, if we go on making a “show” as if everything is “fine”, we only cheat ourselves.

Naturally, Sri Gurudeva is free from judgmental tendencies and full of love for the disciple. Sure, Sri Gurudeva sometimes needs to be strict, but also this strictness is filled with love.

When we approach Sri Gurudeva in a humble attitude and when we confess our weakness to him, his “parental” love will surely be showered upon us.

My Gurudeva writes:

“A saint who is endowed with such attributes [the characteristics of a true Guru – see below] and who is filled with parental love for his disciples, can attain the position of a bona fide Guru. Such a bona fide Guru is able to destroy different obstacles the disciple may find in his bhajana, bless him with prema and bring him to the lotus feet of Śrī Kṛṣṇa.” (Guru-Tattva-Vijnana)

Characteristics:

1) Sri Gurudeva is filled with realisations about the Personality of Godhead due to his firm faith and his firm adherence to the worship of the Lord. He has attained the grace of his own Guru by being similarly devoted to his Guru’s lotus feet.

2) He is very learned in the Vedas and in bhakti-scriptures that outline the Vedic purport such as Śrīmad Bhāgavata. Thus he can destroy the doubts in his disciples.

3) Because he has transcendental realisations about Śrī Kṛṣṇa, he has attained His mercy-potency. Thus he has become so powerful that he is able to bring the disciple onto the path of bhakti and infuse this power within him.

4) He is not overcome by vices like lust and greed.